There were four of these little ones laying in their blue painted beds. All of them were about 3 to 5 weeks old. Tiny, skinny legs were hiding under some blankets. Big brown eyes trying to focus in on their surrounding. One baby started to cry, it took awhile before someone picked it up. So many babies, so few workers. The baby got tied to the workers back, no kisses, no tender touch, no little games, no, just put on the back, while she ran to yet another child in need of a clean rag (diaper). I cought myself thinking; Could I take all four? They are all so cute. How do I pick just one, it is not fair for the other babies?
I prayed; "Lord, you know the one you want in our family, I must trust you, and not go by my natural way of chosing which is by the looks. Lord I need to feel that I would give my life for the baby you have in mind for me. Would you help me by letting my heart go crazy for the one you want us to adopt? I picked one of the babies up and kissed and adored it, than did the same with the next. They were all so cute, but when I held that fourth little baby girl... my heart tore in two. Overwhelmed with love and need to shelter her I looked at Travis; "This is the one Trav, she is it!" I almost lost it as my heart was so broken for this baby girl.
This little girl, (see photo) cross eyed and tiny as can be was defiinately not the best looking of all. Her neck was infected and gross from all the uncleaned spitt-up. Her bum was bright red from the constant pooping. Not the kind of baby I would naturally be atracted to.Yet I knew that I knew that I knew... she was the one.
Now, six months later, I look at this photo of when we first met Yaida and I look at her now... What a transformation. You know, as soon as she entered our home to live with us, her eye became normal and has never been crossed since! All the infections and gross-ness healed and disappeared in a week. Her irregular and strange poop, turned normal and regular as a result of breasfeeding. She crawls and says words like "poes" (kitty in Dutch), all done and "hi" while she waves.
Just the other day I visited the orphanage and spend some time with the 3 babies that I held and kissed. Angela, Angelo and Joseph are their names. All three are cute as can be. But I look at them and am sad. All they do is lay in their bed. They do not say a word, nor crawl or sit up by themselfs. They just lay intheir beds, day in and day out. No-one to kiss them good night, no-one to endlesly count their fingers and toes. No brothers or sisters to have fun with. No mommy to blow raspberries on the tummy.
My heart breaks for Angelo, Angela and Joseph.
But I must say, that my baby girl Yaida has become the funniest, prettiest and goofiest of all!