"My Children"

It is always with excitement and joy that I prepare to visit "my children". Yes the 21 orphans in Rwaza, have captured my heart. They have called me "mami" for awhile, everytime it cut through my heart when they would say the word. I tried to protect my heart and not get to attached to these children. I tried to ignore the mother in me screaming at me to release my heart to love them.

The words of my teachers go through my head; "you should never become too attached to those who need your counsil and help, it dilutes your professional observations and diagnosis". Studies have proven that children who received motherly love develop better in over all life and will have healthier families of their own. There are the statistics of those who have grown up under institutional care and the lack of motherly love, they scare me. And I realize that I cannot get attached enough to these children. They need my motherly love, I might be one of the only mother who can give it to them on a consistant basis. They need my heart to be open for them. They need me to teach them the things only a mother can teach. It hurts because I am fully aware of the sufferings these children endure. The lack of basic love, care and food. My heart aches, it would be so easy to remain detached, but I made the choice, my heart adopted 21 children.It was a special day today as we had received care-bears from ...... The children in the vacation bible school had made these bears with the my Rwaza children in mind. Little notes were placed in a pouch on the bear speaking of Jesus his love for the child and a small note from the child who had carefully made the bear. My kids could not comprehend that American children would care for them to make such bears! They clapped for joy and excitement when they realized they are known, they matter and other children pray for them!

Nani and Zoey gave all children a bear. Seeing their servant hearts without any jealousy or envy of the blessing they gave away blessed me all the more!
"I will sleep with my bear tonight 11 year old Emmanuel exclaimed. My note came from Alex, can you send him my photo, I love him so much, you must tell him thank you from me, 14 year old Gilbert was so sweet and excited to know that someone loves him!
Little Otis, 4 yrs old is always playing with a knife. He is such a tough boy, a fighter for sure, yet he embraced his bear and did not let go. You see, boys like him need mothers who love them, even if that means a knife in one hand and a bear in the other.

Though there was great joy, lunch made me wanna cry. Sweet potatos with may be 15 beans per child... A good filler, but no nutrition. The children were sure glad to see the sambosa's (big meat filled dumplings) and banana's. For dinner we had brought them more banana's and eggs.
Nani and Zoey are serving the children banana's.
My noughty daughters made a little fire with some of their friends. It cracks me up to see children are chidren all over the globe. They all do the same things and all have this noughty side to them!Ishimwe, this precious girl never smiled or laughed, today she did not stop laughing. She was so joyful!Julia and Sam, our friends from the U.K. came along for the day. I felt proud to show off my children to them. It was such a joyful day. Surprised we realized we'd better jump in the car and head back to Kigali to make it before dark. My children, that is who they are, they will be in my heart forver!

Happy Birthday Nani!

Yes it is a cliche; they are growing up too fast! But you know, though a cliche, it rings complete truth to me! It truly is amazing, the first words, first steps, first day of school, first loose tooth... Yet it seems there is one thing that remains the same through it all. The day she was born an overwhelming feeling of responsability overtook me, knowing this was my flesh and blood, this tiny baby overwhelmed me with her presence. This feeling of responsability has never left me, not a single minute. As I watch my Nani blow out 8 candles I am all to aware of this protective, responsability emotion and again I feel it overtakes me.

Nani's birthday party was fun. Pizza, play and movie. I just cannot help but to enjoy the colorful display of children in this photo. The nationalities in this photo: South-African, Ugandan, American, Dutch, Russian, U.K. (England) and Rwandan.

The set up of a little home-movie-theathre was a big succes. 5 girls spend the night after watching 2 movies and having loads of candy, surpsingly they all slept by 10.30 pm and didn't come out of bed until 7 am. The next morning, American pancakes and home made syrup for breakfast!

Happy Birthday Nani!

1998-2007

Remember... 9 years ago around this time we were having lunch with our wedding guests... Remember... Around this time we were at City Hall... Remember, remember, remember.

Happy memmories filled our day as we revisited our wedding day. We thought of all the people that were part of this special day. We thought of our emotions, thoughts and desires for our "Marraige-carreer". And concluded that we are truly amazed at what we have been through, what we have experienced and how we have grown to become who we are today.

We had decided to go on a date to celebrate today. As a lack of things o do in Kigali we wanted to go for a nice workout then dinner at Indian Khazana. After our workout Travis looked at me and said; "Hey I have a surprise" And he showed me the keycard to a hotelroom. Surprised he told me how many of our friends in Kigali had put their money together to bless us with this gift! In the room was a beautiful bouquet of roses and a note from all our friends. We just cried as we wondered what do they see in us that they would bless us like this. They had the care for our kids completely covered and told us to come back whenever... We watched CNN, (we had not seen any world news in over 2 years!) and concluded that we really do not miss anything in the world, the same old news items as always, just with different people. We really enjoyed ourselfs and woke up in the morning because we wanted to, not because we had to! This was after all our first night away from all our children in over 2,5 years!

Thank you Tupo, Ali & Joel, Jean, Lisa & Jeff, Tineke, Shannon, Meredith, Adriaan & Lisette. You guys have no idea how much you all mean to us. Thank you for being our friends!

another link

Dear freinds,

At www.AstridInRwanda.hyves.nl you can read adittional info on my life and ministry in DUTCH !!! This blog also shows up on the page for easy access. There are additional photos when you click on the photo album link. Enjoy!

Lieve vrienden.

Op www.AstridInRwanda.hyves.nl kan je in het nederlands op de hoogte bijven van het rijlen en zeilen van mijn leven, gezin en ministry. De weblogs zoals je je gewend bent staan er ook in het engels op. Er zijn extra photos in de foto albums op de site. Veel lees plezier en laat effe een berichtje achter!

Food for Rwaza

Today was such a special day...

Loaded with 50 kilo's (80lbs) of beans, 50kilo's (80lbs) of rice, 25 kilo's (40lbs) of carrots and 10kilo's (18lbs) of onions, a soccer ball, biscuits and meat, I drove up the tiny road to the almost top of the mountain, the home of the Rwaza orphans.

Mama Deo was in tears when I showed her all the food we brought as she humbly shared how they are just preparing the last food they had and they even cooked the leafs of the cabbage ( a part normally not eaten) just to add some "greens" to the meal.

She walked around telling all the children: tonight we have meat with dinner!! Many cheers were heard and mama Deo explained that it has been many many months since they had last eaten a piece of meat...

All of you who have been praying and giving to this place... thank you so much! If you could have been there today... the joys expressed about the meat and general food was just amazing! You are inpacting lifes in a very deep way! thank you.

It was so much fun to play with the kids. Rough play with the boys and kuddling and tickeling with the litteler ones. It was relaxed and the children expressed how comfortable they had become with us. Below is Meredith, a friend from Australia with a six month Salvation Army commitment to Rwanda.

The last food.
Thank you for the soap!

Mama Deo has found four people to be employed and to help with the care of the children as they take a big part of the practical duties on themselves. Sadly enough we learned that people have stolen the new soccerballs and other new cloths and toys, so we are going to find them a day and night guard to ensure the safety and protection of the children and all their belongings. Want to help with that?

Many good tings are happening in and with Rwaza. The kids are amazing and so well mannered. And mama Deo is just amazing! God bless and keep her!

Back to Kibuye

This piece of land that one day will be the home of SoZo Minstries Africa's Heaven Touching Earth. The orphan village with 256 orphans mothered bu 32 widows... Every time we go here I can hear the sounds of those children playing. The dinner bell sounding and the silence before the dinner prayer. Cows came down the hill and the corner of the property is still the local boat-stop for pick ups and drop-offs. I imagine the boats filled with white and black people who return from the main harbor with soda-pop for special events. I see children jumping from a dock that stretches into the water. Nani and Zoey already made a friend on the land. They played and swam in the lake.
The peace and calm of the place is just amazing. The beauty stunning. One day...

We brought our friends Aaron and Kendra to see the place and they too could see it... Hundreds of children on their face worshipping Jesus. Living in peace and love with themself and each other. Widows that found purpose in life as they love and mother the children. People from all over the globe coming to help and equip the community around and love the children...Keep praying for Heaven Touching Earth. God is on the move, what started with a God given vision will end with a place beaming of Life, full of Jesus and amazing testimonies about our God.

Hope in Rwaza 1

We drove 2 hours in expectation and hope to get to hear Mama Deo's story. Why does a 70 year old nun run an orphanage all by herself. Where is the church, do they help? WHo is responsible, why are there nice buildings yet no food for the children. What is the story? We listened as Mama Deo shared how during the genocide she would walk through the dead bodies picking up the children that were sitting in shock next to their dead parents. How even she had to run and hide with the children she cared for and miraculously survived. Her vision to provide wholeness for the children... wow... She gave up a comfortable life in the convent (place where catholic nuns live) for a live of extreme poverty with the children she so selflessly loves.

(Picture above)
One of the young girls (about 8) taking care of one of the litteler ones. Mama Deo is all by herself in the care of her children. She loves them so much, it is so obvious the children love her too and they all group around her as soon as she sits down. They know she makes great sacrifices out of her love for them. She is so bussy that the children are left to take care of themselves.
Listening to Mama Deo's story we had to hold back the tears as we realized her desire for wholeness and our desire for wholeness. This 70 year old catholic nun has the same vision for the orphans of Rwaza as us, as couple in their 30's coming from wealthy western nations.

Mama Deo showed us the little plot of land she bought for cultivation. Emmanuel proudly shows me the milk cow they have.

Aaron and Kendra. Friends of ours that are visiting us. Aaron also designed and keeps up our website.

Hope in Rwaza 2

Here is the Rwaza clan! Mama Deo is the old woman with the white head cover. The two big girls (top right) are from the older orphanage Mama Deo runs.

As soon as we arrived at Rwaza the children asked for Nani. Excited she came they showed her their fingernails. And yes, Nani cam prepared and faithfully painted all their toes and nails.
This little guy sat on my lap for awhile. I kept stroking his arms and face within a few minutes he was in a deep sleep.
This boy was sitting on a rock with his head down. I asked him what was wrong and he started to cry. He had a headache he said. Trav and I prayed for the boy who by then just lost it. Travis picked him up and held him for a while, explaining that crying is ok. Mama Deo who listened in agreed. From that moment the boy was unseperable from Trav. A boy in need of a father...

Being with these great children and seeing their desire for love, attention and care. The need for physical affirmation and joy. To let the emotions loose. All of this makes me thank the Lord more and more for His words: " I will not leave you as orphans, but I will come to you." (John 14:19)

At the end of the day we knew God called us to this place to assist this amazing woman. We will do whatever we can as a ministry to help Mama-Deo in her vision for wholeness for these wonderful children, her children, as she proudly calls them.

Thanks to the support of many of you we are able to employ four people for cultivation, animal care, laundry and cleaning! Mama Deo was very excited with this news. Hope came in the hearts of many at Rwaza Orphanage today.

Kumbya 1 Missionary retreat

Kumbya is a little peninsula in the south-western corner of Rwanda. A peninsula that has been used for missionary retreat since the 1950's. A beatiful place at Lake Kivu.
We went for a 9 day missionary retreat. We saw many of our missionary friends there and made many new ones. Jim Copeland, a former Promise Keeper leader spoke to us on Shepherd Leadership and seriously challenges all of our leadership styles based on biblical principals. We had times of worship, VBS for the big girls and lots of time for games and lake side fun.
I did not realize how tired I was until people around me asked if I was ok 'cause I didn't look all that good... scary when that happens. It took about two days before we all had settled and rest started to enter all of our lives. Though it was not per se a relaxing time (really what would that look like with little children) it was a good time. I did worship with my friends and just enjoyed being there. No agenda, no obligations. Travis and I were asked to share our testimony. During the course of the week many people came and thanked us for re-fireing their vision for Rwanda and their heart for the lost.
We drove through the Nyangwe forest. A rainforest with incredible beauty. Nani counted 27 monkeys on the way through it. Everywhere we went military marched the roads keeping the area protected from the malitia that is still believed to be hiding in this thick forest.
Our camp site. We used our tent (thanks Corrie & Daniel & Fam.) which was big enough for all of us to sleep in. We also had a grass hut build for shade and storage. We came prepared with tarp as we heard stories of people beig washed out of their huts last year.Up until about the 1950's these grass huts were the houses of many Rwandans. Even the King would live in a grass hut, though much bigger and fancier, but with the same concept. We were surpised how nicely cool it stayed inside during the hot hours of the day. It was quite the experience!

Kumbya 2

Jasmin and Yaida
Most of our afternoons were spent at the beach by the Lake, to great enjoyment of all the girls. There were also movie nights with popcorn!!! at the beach and the Vacation Bibleschool would do slip and slides there also. It was such a fun time!

Nani and Zoey during skit night.

We laughed so hard that night! People who are normally reserved and seem very concervative in their thinking came up with skits about the "missionary long drop training" now the long drop discibes the toilets and the training was a demonstration of how to aim properly and what not to do!

Others wrote songs inspired by the beauty of Kumbya and after a sweet and touching introduction started their song with the skreetching sound of the crows. We jumped from our chairs only to roll on the floor in laughter!